I'm ready for you, even though sometimes it feels like no one else is. They think I'm not ready, or strong enough, or haven't considered the impact you might have in our lives. But they don't know that you, just like your brother and sisters have been my dream come true in life. What I live for. Why i'm still here. I was meant to be a mommy and I have worked harder than anyone will ever know for you. For all of you and I love you even more than I ever thought possible., and I can't wait to see your beautiful picture even if it is the only picture I will ever have of you.
In some ways I actually feel a closer bond to you. You and me we're not 'perfect', we both took longer to prove that we were strong enough to survive. We are fighters.
I'm not going to lie, this last month as I have been getting ready for you has been excruciating. I have been so physically sick and absolutely exhausted emotionally. I have not been the best wife, struggled as a mommy, and fought the doubts, anxieties, and physical discomforts I experienced in ways that might not have been constructive. But such is life (my life) and I am not going to dwell on the past. I love you and truly believe that you deserve the very best.
You (we all) have a very special angel looking over you....you 'became you ' right beside her 3 years ago almost to the day.....incredible how life goes!
Abbey will be your guardian angel just like she is mine. Without her I wouldn't be strong enough. Forever more she will be my fight song and my inspiration. She will be what bright me back to you.
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